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Saturday, May 28, 2011

advice, advice, advice

The only way to survive all of those people giving you advice, making suggestions on how you should do things with your baby is to ask questions as you need to, listen as though you really appreciate what they are saying, and then vow to make up your own mind with you alone and your husband.

People offer you advice constantly as you become a parent. I mean, look at me, I made a blog full of ideas and advice for goodness sake! It's natural for people who love you to want to offer help, especially if they have been there before. It's scary becoming a parent for the first time. You will appreciate much of the advice you get.

My one caution is that you stick together as a couple before taking anyone's advice. Check in with each other. Is this really what you believe, or are you believing it because your friend or mom or sister-in-law told you this is how it should be?

You have to do what works for you. End of story. The reason for that is because your baby is different from every other baby on the planet, and you as parents together are different than any other couple out there working as mom or dad.

Whether you nurse one day or for a year, or don't even want to try it out because it's not for you - that is OK, your baby will be just fine and so will you. You should not compare yourself to another mother. It's not worth it. You need to be confident that you can trust your instincts, listen to your husband and pediatrician, and read up on what you are confused about. Yes, it's wonderful to have friends who are there for you and mothers who are there to tell you what it was like for them. Talking to my mom friends helps me get by some days, but at the end of the day you truly need to trust yourself and do what works for you.

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